THE MIDNIGHT BEAST – Wands

I’m Gary potter,
You haven’t heard’a me
You may of seen my bro in the Potter Octalogy (what?)
That’s eight films you know, I’m quite smart
But that didn’t help… getting me a Harry Potter part

Should’a gone to Hogwarts, I didn’t get in
Now I’m living life as a wizard has been
‘Cause life’s not pretty, it’s actually grim
Not a fairytale by JK Rowling

The wands on the streets are dangerous
They’re easy to get, I got two!!
It don’t matter if you’re famous
We’re still gonna come for you

Hanging round the streets
Getting wasted on Butter-beer
Disappear, steal a couple tings from the sweet shop
Reappear…
I got a bump on my head like a tortoise
Running head first at 9 and 3 quarters

Everybody put your wand in the air
Put your wand in the air (put em up)
Put your wand in the air
If you don’t get respect
If you’re a wizard reject

Put your wand in the air
Put your wand in the air (put em up)
Put your wand in the air
If you can’t do a spell
Dumbledor you as well

I used to go to Hogwarts but I had enough
Soon as I got sorted and put in to Hufflepuff
Told the sorting hat, go fuck yourself and I quit
‘Cause everybody knows that Hufflepuff is shit

I’m dead sirius… black was my heart when my girl got stole
Hermione YOU ATE MY SOUL
Like a demontor… Weasley I’m coming for you
I got Wizard GPS on my Nimbus broom

Us gingers are meant to stick together…
Just kidding I’m not really ginger
It’s just a Hedwig

Everybody put your wand in the air
Put your wand in the air (put em up)
Put your wand in the air
If you don’t get respect
If you’re a wizard reject

Put your wand in the air
Put your wand in the air (put em up)
Put your wand in the air
Because magic is sick
Voldemort? You’re a dick! Oh

I’ll give you a guess which house I was in
Aloehomora your legs n i’ll slytherin

All the witches in the place
Think I’m pretty harmless till
I expelliarmous from
My dickaramous

What do they expect-o?
After I got hexed ohhh
Now I walk round with a constant erecto

Would you help reducto
Might involve a fuck though
Hogwarts threw me out quick
For rubbing my broomstick

Everybody put your wand in the air
Put your wand in the air (put em up)
Put your wand in the air
If you don’t get respect
If you’re a wizard reject

Put your wand in the air
Put your wand in the air (put em up)
Put your wand in the air
I keep a spare in my pocket
If you’re a nasty fat hobbit