SMOSH – The Legend Of Zelda Rap

Yeah, my name is Link, man
More well known than ‘Lil Wayne
Oh you thought my name was Zelda?
(That’s a fucking girl’s name!)

I’ve saved the world like 15 times
And saved the princess from demise
And I do it all alone
With no help and no advice

(Hey, look, listen)
Hey look listen you fucking annoying fairy
I’d rather be forced to listen
To constant Katy Perry

I think it’s about time
I got some recognition
Don’t you think
Legend of Zelda?
Screw that!
Legend of Link!

[Chorus]
Cause he’s the
L to the I to the n to the k
Wears tights everyday
Don’t give a damn what you say
Got bigger balls than even
Evel Knievel and he ain’t
Gonna stop till the world
Is free of evil

I’ll break all your pots
And I best not hear you bitchin’
I’ve got the triforce of courage
Bitch
So you better listen

That’s right
I’m called the bushwhacker
And my bank account’s maxed out
Got 999 rupees and my leather wallet’s packed now

Can’t back down can’t slack now
The world needs me to attack now
Yet I’m forced to pay out the ass
For these bombs in castle town
Just give me some heart containers
And let me spit on my ocarina
So I can kick that dumb-ass Ganon
All the way to Argentina

[Chorus]

[Ganon]
Yo you low life elf
Need a ride up to the north pole
Santa’s got a thing for elves
Gettin’ his marriage annulled

You really think savin’ the princess
Will convince me your straight?
The uggs and skirt fad is so 2008

[Link]
Oh snap!
It’s Ganondorf tryin’ to jock on my style
Batman’s cape? Lincoln’s beard?
Were you dressed by a child?

You’re a ginger with no soul!
And you look like a fucking troll
Isn’t kidnapping helpless girls
Gettin’ a little bit old

[Ganon]
You think Zelda’s stupid enough to get
Kidnapped so often
She runs off into my castle
Into my room and begs to get locked in
Ya she’s sick of your little deku nuts
And your girly fairy face
L-i-n-k more like
L-i-n-Gay

[Link]
Man you should have been aborted
Just like the jersey shore
Its a damn lie you told about Zelda
‘Cause she loves my master sword
It’s a shame your whole life’s been a waste
Tryin’ to rule Hyrule
Cause today will be known as
The day you got schooled!

[Chorus in background]